What would you do/say?

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corky05

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One of my four children, Nicholas Palmer, age 7, is starting to show some promise. He recently played in a Ryder Cup format Jr. tournament and shot a 77 on the last day. All was going well. Then he came home and said, "I don't want to play anymore, golf is an old peoples game". I know this influence is from school. I don't believe in making my chidren indulge in athletics just because I'm passionate about them. However, I don't think this is him saying this, but him mirroring what he is hearing at a pretty rural, non-golfing school. Am I doing him a disservice by making him play or by not making him play? Thanks, Rich
 
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cdog

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I wouldnt make him play, I would continue to ask him to go play rounds with you, its something you can do tegether, and maybe he will see that he truly does want to take it a step further.
 
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corky05

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Thanks, however he seems to like the tournaments more because there are other Jrs there, and he likes practice at the club less because there are fewer kids there on a daily basis. Not that we are there daily. Maybe, twice a week?
 
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drewitgolf

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As a former junior golf chairman for the Rhode Island PGA and having helped junior golfers learn about golf for more than 20 years, I can tell you that forcing golf on them is the quickest way to turn them off. Nicholas might need a break for a while to persue other things that seven years olds like to do, especially with his friends that may not play golf. Back off for a while, but leave his clubs out where he can see them. After a week or two, ask him he would like to go to the range or putting green with dad (no pressure). Remember, you can lead a horse to water, but you can't make him drink. The drinking, or golf, has to be his idea. Give him time. He has plenty of it, and plenty of time to rediscover the joy that may now be missing. Let him come back because he wants to, not because you want him to. Just keep those clubs where he can see them.
 
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corky05

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Drewitgolf, Thanks! I'm seeing and hearing signs of that already! This morning from the 2nd floor I could here clunk, clunk. It was Nick chipping in his room. The reason I'm opening up and having a dialogue with you folks is because I know there is a lot of experience. And Im glad I found someone with a Jr. golf background.
The name is coincidental and as I said earlier, I haven't ever pressured my children to do anything with exception of homework. I have a 19 yr. old son,Freshman in college. He maybe played golf twice and went to the range less than a half a dozen times.
What was confusing me was the change from,"I've played in four tournaments with kids 2yrs older than me and I won. I love golf! Golf is the best!". Then you come home from school and say I don't want to play its for old people.
The quandary for me was, " Am I a Bad Dad for letting closed minded people unfamiliar with this great game influence my son" or Am I a Bad Dad if I press him to play. Which message is worse? Thanks again!
 
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bsbsbs

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I was just kidding, sorry.
I agree with drewitgolf totally, I ran the junior clinic at the golf course I use to work at.
of course you would be a bad dad if you pressed him to play, however without ever mentioning the word golf you need to tell him that he is smart kid that is capable of making his own decisions, that he shouldn't ever let anybody tell him or pressure him in what he should and shouldn't do.
You get this message across now and the big problems later in life, smoking, sex, drugs, will not be an issue. The greatest gift a father can give his child is a good example and the ability for him to grow up to be his own man.
 
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drewitgolf

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quote:Originally posted by bsbsbs

I was just kidding, sorry.
I agree with drewitgolf totally, I ran the junior clinic at the golf course I use to work at.
of course you would be a bad dad if you pressed him to play, however without ever mentioning the word golf you need to tell him that he is smart kid that is capable of making his own decisions, that he shouldn't ever let anybody tell him or pressure him in what he should and shouldn't do.
You get this message across now and the big problems later in life, smoking, sex, drugs, will not be an issue. The greatest gift a father can give his child is a good example and the ability for him to grow up to be his own man.
Click to expand...


:D
 
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Mathew

Banned
Pushing your child is not something that I find anything wrong with. It is actually important as kids find a new fad to obsess about all the time. You keep your childs focus but you must 'push' your child in the a manner which inspires him and doesn't 'tell' him to do it....

Take him out to see the pro's play for example....
 
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